Upon Awakening (WC)

  

(Wendy Cabell, published in Paranormal Whispers, edited by Ruchi Acharya, Wingless Dreamer Publisher, 2022.  From January 30, 2021, feast day of Our Lady of the Rose, Saint Bathilde (above) and Saint Alegunde. Also the Shabbat of Song, as well as being just a couple days after the first full moon of 2021. Image from here.)

Upon Awakening

(imagined letter, in response to a dream)

Bonnie: A Scottish name meaning beauty, rooted in the Latin meaning, of goodness.

January 28, 2021

My Dear Child,

I wonder if you find it strange, my coming to you in these dreams. But there's much to say. And I think you know by now that humans aren't the only ones who can love. Or can see. And I can still see you, your little femur snapped right in two, like a matchstick. All those months not able to walk. It'd only been a year and a half since you came. Born is the word, that's right. I thought, I bet she'd like a pony to ride around on. Collie shamallie, I can be a pony too when I've a mind to be. And child, you should have seen it, your little face softening, eyes brightening. For those moments I could make you forget the pain. And those moments too when your hand reached out, stroked my fur. Or held on for dear life to the softness, the warmth there. And being up here like I am now, I just had to come and tell you. That this is what God is like. This love, this warmth, this carrying. He had such the smile when I told Him about the pony rides. And when I told Him about standing guard at your bedside. Even how I used to chew the mail to shreds, just to make sure it was all nice and safe. He let flow the most musical laugh just then, and kissed my head. "Well done, good and faithful servant, couldn't have done it better Myself ", He said. And a God like that, you know He's good, and He's love, and He's warmth. Guess Way, Truth, and Life is how the Book puts it.

So I just had to come, to tell you. That when you think of God, think of me. Of how it felt, feels, to be carried, by a pony that never shirks under the pain of the weight. Whose eyes are all about seeing how to make you smile somehow. Whose Apple of His Eye you are. Who's there with soft, and warmth, and love that your hands can hold somehow if you look. Who stands guard, even when you're asleep and don't see. Or Who does things that look just plum crazy till one day you actually see. And then know, just how much you are treasured.

So that's why I came. Maybe will again, keep the dream journal handy. But if not, I'll still be standing guard. Even when your soul sleeps, and does not see. 

Love,

Bonnie

*From combined prompts: Dream occurred during a nap which had followed Naa Akua's Quarantine Write-in class (via Hugo House, Seattle) with some writing prompts around remembering one's ancestors and impactors, January 28, 2021. Also prompt to explore one's sense of who God is, from Sister Monika's Silent Retreat With Art (Saint Placid Priory, Lacey, WA), January 29-31, 2021; as well as the nudge to both companion, and reframe, our trauma, via current Abbey of the Arts A Midwinter God course. I drew upon this powerful dream had had January 28. Idea of beginning imagined letters with “My Dear Child” is from Kayleen Asbo’s recent classes (Wisdom of the Heart (via Bishop's Ranch, Healdsburg, CA) December 20, 2020, and The Way of The Hermit (via Abbey of the Arts), January 24, 2021).